I see my daughters life in photographs now.

I don’t see her life with her.  I see images of her and her life.

I see her smile but I don’t hear the laughter that comes from that smile.

I don’t see her singing.

I don’t see her.


All because “her Mother” cannot handle things.

Why is it necessary for one person to lie to make themselves feel better? to feel superior? to see the other person weakened?

2 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Denise
    Sep 11, 2009 @ 02:18:35

    If I knew I would share that with you. I suffer the same things from my son’s adoptress as well. She is insecure and projects that on to my son who is now 20 years old. We have been in reunion since he turned 18 as it was a closed adoption. She projects her insecurity so fully our son has pulled back completely from us and we have not heard his sweet voice for almost 9 months now. Each day i struggle with the very thoughts you share here. I long to hear his voice, see his smile, to answer the phone and for it to him on the other end. Maybe one day again. I guess I can only hope that it will be so.

    Be Well,

  2. heatherrainbow
    Jan 22, 2010 @ 17:05:04

    Thank you so much for sharing your experiences. I’m also a mother who regrets every day that I signed papers giving up my rights to my daughter. I also struggle with the fact that the adoptors can’t deal with me, and lied so much so that my daughter doesn’t even know she’s adopted. I see pictures, too, but do not hear her laughter.

    Just wanted you to know you are not alone in this struggle.

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