Photos

I see my daughters life in photographs now.

I don’t see her life with her.  I see images of her and her life.

I see her smile but I don’t hear the laughter that comes from that smile.

I don’t see her singing.

I don’t see her.

 

All because “her Mother” cannot handle things.

Why is it necessary for one person to lie to make themselves feel better? to feel superior? to see the other person weakened?

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Phone calls and pictures

I got more pictures in the mail the other day.  I wish there was more.  I wish there were a hell of a lot more.

I had plans on making a call to L today.  Well, it being summer in New England and the sun is out, the humidity is up and I know from the past that they are at the beach.  However, that maybe changing since clouds are rolling in and there is a weather alert.

So I was thinking about calling tomorrow or even Friday since it will be cooler and there will be no humidity.

Now if only I will have the guts to do a true mediation instead of this phone crap.

 

* there will be no phone call this week.  E was going to try and get together with L this week but they are out of town.

Phone call

Okay meant to write this yesterday but was having some other computer issues so here is, finally, the phone call from E.

She said:

  • -Supergirl was great, lovely (I know this)
  • Visits in the past have been great not awkward
  • L is confused by Supergirl’s response from the last 2 visits
  • Supergirl is excited for the visits but then clams up (just to mention, again, that I have yet to see this, still waiting, but then again it has been over a year and next week makes 13 months)
  • L said she is open minded.  I had to laugh at this.  REALLY, open minded, then why did I have to wait 3 months to find out visits were done?!?!?!   oh yeah, open minded
  • L is fine with talking with K and fine with talking to E
  • E asked if I had any little requests/messages for L.  I actually couldn’t think of anything except for not wanting to be told anything through a 3rd party.  All of the big stuff has been through a 3rd party and has not come from L
  • E said that she wants to work on communication with L so that I am not left to draw my own conclusions.  My response “No shit”

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On a much happy note.

Coworker (CW) got some more pictures for me!!!!  It seems that Supergirl and her son are playing tball, they are not on the same team 😦  but there was some one there who took photos on the first day and had placed them on a snapfish account.  CW ordered those for me.  Out of the 19 she ordered, 16 were of Supergirl.  She said she didn’t know who she was more excited for: finding pictures of her son or finding photos of Supergirl for me.

Letters

I was informed that the letter was sent to Supergirl’s Mom.

I am freaking out alittle bit.  Why?  because I don’t know what it said.  I don’t know if they have received the letter yet.  I am guessing so since I know I can mail things on Monday and they get it on Tuesday and vice versa.  So now I would like to, if possible, get my hands on a copy of the letter to see what the agency had to say to L.

Biker boy is starting to make an appearance again.  The warmer weather is getting him out since he can now ride his Harley and not worry about not having a car.

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I received some pictures from L from Supergirl’s birthday.  It appears that she had 2 parties, not just one.  One that was with friends and was  a cooking party and the other is the party with family and friends.

I haven’t seen her in almost a year and all ready I can not really recognize her any more.  Is this because I remember her from the last visit? I still see her singing.  I still see her playing a monkey.

I don’t remember her with her hair up.  I don’t remember how her face has changed since that rainy, damp day in April 08.